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This was my hobby that I took so much pride in. I wanted to share gaming with her, but gaming wasn't good enough. She enjoyed spending time with me, but to get through the activity itself, she had to grit her teeth and indulge me in so many embarrassing places. Gameplay rescued us sometimes. Character design was a constant slap in the face, always carrying the stink of demographic targeting and unabashed fan service.
“I want to see myself represented,” she told me once, with a bone-weariness that I knew I couldn't alleviate. I realized that most of our tried-and-true narratives are taken from history and thus exclude women. Any period piece (Sengoku Japan, Early China, Ancient Rome, Prohibition-Era America) automatically marginalizes women because, with a few exceptions, they weren't allowed to do anything until about 1970. No matter how riveting you think that Tom Hanks movie is where he's a mob hitman travelling the country with his son, a woman will look at the screen and see no one like herself and a story set in a time when women were barely allowed to vote. Men get to imagine that we are Tom Hanks, and she gets to imagine…what? Doing the dishes? Getting killed in the first five minutes? My heart went out to her and to all women who wish to be space captains and crime fighters and great historical figures.
Just by talking to a woman on a regular basis and re-experiencing games with her added perspective; my view was changing. I realized that the iceberg tip I had glimpsed years before, when I was told that my fluff interview was not appropriate, was an honest-to-god civil rights issue, right in front of my face, in my industry. In myhobby. Viewed in this context, things that I would previously have ignored (or even laughed at) started to stick out like sorest of thumbs.
It's a long one, but read the rest at the source. It's worth it.
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For me, the big reason why I thought this was interesting and worth sharing is that this was posted not on some random dude's blog, but on starcitygames.com, which is one of the biggest, if not the biggest Magic: The Gathering fan sites.
It's not a perfect article, it's problematic in many places, but I thought it was an interesting article, because of where it's posted (starcitygames.com, pretty much a bastion of the kind of geek culture that's hostile to women) and by whom it was written (one of their major columnists).
I don't think it says anything in the article that will be news to anyone in
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Also maybe I'm weird but when I watch a movie, I relate to the character who most matches my personality. Male or female. For me, the representation of women in games is more a social issue than a "I need a female character so I can immerse myself in this game."
But from what I skimmed of the article, it seems like he touched on some of the bigger issues about society and the gamer culture. It's just a few things like this that are a bit off-putting.
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But personally? Never had a problem with it. Anything my friends and I didn't like, we simply threw out and replaced. People played whatever sex of character they wanted; we had swapping in both directions. I would wonder if this was just because I'm not much feminine myself ... but the other girl gamers of my acquaintance have mostly taken the same approach.
And the plots? I can't stay on a paged plot for ten minutes, and neither can anyone I've played with outside of tournaments or other convention activities. A real game is like a battle plan; it never survives first contact. That's a good thing. It makes the action much more interesting. Whatever the players latch onto, that's where it goes. The female players ... can't say I've noticed a consistent difference in what they like than the male ones.
This is not to say that discrimination isn't bothersome or doesn't discourage some people from playing. Just, it doesn't discourage everyone, and some people only notice it in the rearview mirror where it's been ground under the wheels of the tank they drove over it without seeing it.
Maybe look for game systems that are more flexible in terms of character representation and plot? Those could be recommended.